Thoughts

The life of an apprentice

So I have finally finished my apprenticeship and I can say that luckily I have been taken on after a year apprenticeship to be in a proper job.

I can’t believe I made it to a year because honestly there were times when I didn’t want to continue working anywhere in general.

Where I did my years apprenticeship I was really nervous, where I started I was the only female engineer and it was intimidating at first.  However, the first thing I learnt about being the only female engineer was that no one cares. No cares if you’re female you’re just another engineer that can fix things, another pair of hands, another team member and it felt nice. As well as this everyone was happy to help if I needed it. Instead of being scared to ask for help I was encouraged and reminded that it was ok because I’m an apprentice and I’m not expected to know everything. It was also nice that everyone has each others backs and will back you up if you haven’t done anything wrong and always make sure that you cover yourself before you send out anything.

I struggled a lot with my mental health and as a result of that I found it hard working constantly at my apprenticeship, doing all the college work required and also having another job on the weekends. I ended up overwhelming myself and stopped eating and my mental health took a nose dive. I had my friends there for me and I reached out to them and felt much better for it. I found a great work to life ratio and this made me so much happier working.

An apprenticeship is an amazing opportunity. You get to experience working for real and you also get to learn about how to do the job you want to do. You get a qualification, experience and you also get paid. The wage isn’t great for an apprentice however you are learning and getting training and things for free instead of paying for university. I would recommend an Apprenticeship to anyone going into work that is heavily practical such as; Plumber, Electrician, IT technician, Engineering, Mechanic, and many other jobs.

I would suggest getting as much training as you can while you are an apprentice as if you don’t get taken on after your apprenticeship then you at least have lots of experience and valuable training.

Standard
Thoughts, Uncategorized

Do you trust yourself?

People say that the worst thing is when you can’t trust the person you love more than anything in the world. I disagree the worst thing is when you can’t even trust yourself anymore. when you wonder if you not hungry because it’s hot or brain has decided you shouldn’t be eating. When you see yourself in the mirror and you wonder if you really look like that or if you’re seeing your insecurities more enhanced. You wonder whether you feel ill because of you’ve caught a cold or if you’ve become run down because you’re working yourself too hard. You wonder if everything is really that stressful or if you make things more stressful for yourself.

Do you even trust what you are seeing? Do you even trust yourself?

Standard
Thoughts, Uncategorized

Hi Mum

Hi mum,

You had me when you were 22. You were a single parent and your mother disowned you and you kept me. You knew that my dad was either the guy you were with then or another guy and it turns out it was the other guy. You told him and he didn’t want to be involved in our lives. You made sure I had food every day of my life and you sacrificed so many things, you life was hardly all figured out before you had me and afterwards even less so but you managed and you muddled through.

I always had clothes on my back, I may not have been able to have the newest toy out but I got to go to the library and borrow books and when I did get a new toy like the baby Annabelle I asked for three Christmases in a row I always took care of it and made sure that It didn’t get broken. My cousins in contrast to me got anything they wanted and as soon as I got something like the baby Annabelle they instantly had one too. I remember getting a Nintendo DS lite and being so happy that I could finally fit in with all my friends and instantly my cousins had one. I saved up all my money to get an iPod as our MP3 player kept breaking and I wanted something new of my own, it was the happiest day I can remember going to Sainsbury’s picking out my new iPod and then going to the checkout and paying for it with my own money. I never felt like I missed out on much except spending time with you. The one thing I never got was time with you, you always worked late nights so I was always at my Granny’s and when you were off work well then Granny would babysit me so you could go out.

Our relationship is strained sometimes, we don’t communicate as well as we should. You get tired and irritable and I get annoyed by how petty you can be when you don’t take into consideration that I work more then you do and I’m tired too. I work two jobs in addition to doing a full time college course but because you do late nights 4 days a week my problems and tiredness doesn’t exist.

I don’t hate you. I love you more than anything and I always will because you’re my mum and we have been through a lot of stuff together but you make it hard to like you sometimes.

I love you Mum

Standard
Fandom, Thoughts

20 Years of Harry Potter

As it’s 20 years since the Harry Potter and the Philosophers Stone Book was first published I decided to write a post for it.

It been 20 years since the first Harry Potter book was published and a lot has changed in that time. A whole book series follow the Harry Potter story, These books were made into films, Three small books which were extra to the Harry Potter story were published two for comic relief, A play was written, and a new series of films are coming out currently for Fantastic Beasts. Not to mention a lot of merchandise from T-Shirts to Games to sweets.

Harry Potter helped my love of reading and made me strive to read anything I could. I still reread Harry Potter every year because it feels like home and I always want to go back there when I can. I’ve made a lot of friends thanks to Harry Potter whether they are online friends or real life friends. It has also brought me out of my shell more and helped me with my confidence which I struggled with a lot growing up and even now sometimes. It also helped me escape the bullying I had all throughout my childhood. Harry Potter will and always will be my safe place and I am forever grateful that it’s in my life and will be forever.

Thank you for reading my thoughts about 20 years of Harry Potter.

Standard
Thoughts, Uncategorized

Distant

via Daily Prompt: Distant/ 

Do I seem distant to you? Why? Because I’m not the one who always messages you? Because I work 6 days a week and always ‘blow you off’. Or maybe it’s because I don’t want to go out drinking until super late when I have work the next day and you don’t have responsibilities.

Do I really seem distant to you? or am I just quiet because all you do is drown me in your problems without ever asking me about mine.

Am I distant or do you just not understand me.

Standard
Thoughts, Uncategorized

5 things not to ask me 30 minutes before I finish work

1. Could you just quickly do this job for me before we finish.

2. Don’t forget that report.

3. Only 30 minutes to go for you I get to leaves now.

4. we need your help downstairs it’ll only take roughly half an hour.

5. We’ve just found out we’ve got visitors you need to help tidy up everything right now.

(These are all things people have said to me when there is only half an hour left of the work day )

Standard